What should I do if my ex-husband fails to support his children?
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QUESTION:
I have 2 children with my ex husband. We have been divorced coming up to 2 years. He refuses to pay maintenance for his children. I have reported him to child maintenance and i am waiting to hear back. I am getting frustrated because he chooses not to see his children or speak to them on a regular basis. The children miss their father and i am running out of excuses. I will not lie to my children. But they are becoming older how do i answer their questions about the absence of their father?
ANSWER:
In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.
As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh.
Dear sister, our du’ās are with you and we pray the Allah Ta’ālā eases your situation. Āmeen.
Allah Ta’ālā mentions in the Holy Qur’ān:
ولنبۡلونكم بشیۡء من ٱلۡخوۡف وٱلۡجوع ونقص من ٱلامو ٰل وٱلانفس وٱلثمر ٰت وبشر ٱلصٰبرین – ٱلذین إذا أصٰبتهم مصيبة قالوا۟ إنا لله وإناۤ إلیۡه ر ٰجعون-او۟لٰئك علیۡهمۡ صلو ٰت من ربهمۡ ورحۡمة وأو۟لئك هم ٱلۡمهۡتدون
Translation: “And We will surely test you with something of fear and hunger and a loss of wealth and lives and fruits, but give good tidings to the patient. Those, who when a calamity afflicts them, they say, “To Allah we belong, and indeed to Him we shall return.” They will be given blessings and mercy from their Lord, and it is they who are rightly guided.” [1]
Thus, for a believer, every situation is a situation of potential gain; either through patience in the difficult moments or with gratitude in the moments of ease. At times, when Allah Ta’ālā wants to forgive a slave of his, or when he wishes to elevate the status of his slave, he creates a test through which one reaches such heights that he/she could never have reached if he/she had not been tested.
The Prophet (peace be upon him) has said:
من ستر عورة مسلم في الدنيا ستر الله عورته في الآخرة
Translation: “He who conceals a fault of a Muslim, Allah will conceal his faults in the Hereafter.” [2]
It is thus advised, that you retain the positive image which your children have of their father. In the meantime, try to connect with your ex-husband through a third party; a senior member of your family who may be able to get through to your ex-husband and get him to address the responsibilities which he has. Thereafter, if there is still no progress, we recommend that you consult a reliable local scholar, who even your husband confides in, for further guidance.
May Allah Ta’ālā grant you happiness and the best in this world and in the hereafter. Āmeen.
And Allah Ta’ālā Knows Best
Abdullah Teladia
Concurred by:
Hanif Yusuf | Mubasshir Talha | Zayd Imran
References
[1]
[al-Qur’ān: 2:155]
[2]
[Musnad Ahmad: 7701]
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Posted in Nikah & Talaq (Marriage & Divorce)Aadaab (Ettiquettes & Manners)Daily MattersSocial Conduct on 1st May 2022 by Our Imam | 635 Views
